Monday, February 28, 2011

Rocky's 4 Year Old Sister and Step Mom in a Car Accident.

Carrie and Tammie Loveless (the blonde 4 year old)

This weekend has been sad for Rocky's family. On Saturday, Feb 25, 2011 at 1 am, Rocky's step mom, Carrie, and his little 4 year old sister was in a car accident. Carrie was pronounced dead at the scene. Tammie (Rocky's sister) was taken to Lake Cumberland Hospital, then flown to University of Kentucky hospital because of serious injuries. She has a little bit of blood in her spinal cord, but overall was checked out to be okay, and after spending awhile in the PICU, they sent Tammie home on Sunday night. We are just grateful that Tammie is okay, cause on Saturday morning, Rocky got the call from his dad, saying he was unsure if Tammie would make it. But she is doing great now.
One of the hardest parts in all of this, is that Rocky's dad and Rocky had to tell Tammie that her mom has died. They told her Sunday, right before they left the hospital with guidance of a priest and a grief councilor. As for right now, Tammie does not really understand what it means that her mother has died, which can be good and bad thing. But she was happy to go home with her daddy.
I am just so grateful for the gospel at times like this. I am grateful that I have a worthy man. Rocky is the only member of the church in his family, but because he is worthy he was able to go right to the hospital and do such a great service to his family. He was able to give Tammie a blessing to help heal her, and the next day, she was out of the hospital. Rocky went from worrying, to telling me that she is being her obnoxious self in a matter of a day. I believe that to be the power of the priesthood. I am so lucky to be married to such a worthy priesthood holder! I am so grateful for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints!

I am glad that Rocky was able to be there for his dad. He was the one person in his family that was able to go to the hospital to be with his dad and sister. If he was not there, than his dad would have done it alone. So I am glad that Rocky was able to step up for them and help them. He is a great son, father, brother and hubby!

Tammie in the PICU, Feb 25, 2011

I have more recent pictures of her that we took at Christmas time. I will get those up soon.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Happy Valentines Day Rocky!

This blog is dedicated to my lover, Rocky! I love him so much. I know that I am not the best wife, but you love me for all of my faults. I am so grateful for that. I do not know where my life would be right now, without you in my life. You gave up your bachelor life, for me and my two boys. You got an instant family, which is hard for a lot of men to do. I know it has not been easy for you either, but you have taken my boys on as your own, and I appreciate that sooo much.

You have given me such a beautiful blessing, babe. You are the father of my children, and I would not have it any other way. You are a great father to Kody and DJ, and I KNOW you will be a great father to Lilly and Logan! They are so lucky to come into this world with you as their father. I can see it know, those two little babies will have you wrapped around their fingers. I am blessed cause you are the kind of man that will be totally involved in their lives. I know that you will help get up with them in the middle of the night, feed them, play with them, read to them, teach them. You are not the kind of man that will leave it up to me. I am so blessed for that. I know this as a fact, cause how much you take a role in helping with Kody and DJ. I know they love you with all their hearts! I think it is so cute, that one of the reason you are glad that we are having twins, is because "I won't hog the baby. You will have one too!" You are a great father and you will just get better.

I love you baby with all my heart. You are my life, my best friend, and my lover. I would not have it any other way. Thank you for loving me, and taking on all of my faults. Thank you for loving me with all of your heart. Thank you for being there for me. I so wish you were here right now. I just want you to hold me. I love that you are such a snuggler! But I know that this time away is to help improve our family situation. I am grateful that you are willing to sacrifice so much for our little family. Our whole marriage you have done a lot of sacrificing, I see that and I love you more for it. You work so hard for us. It will all pay off! Until then, please stick through my mood swings, I know I am not easy to live with. But you ARE the love of my life. You have proven yourself to be a GREAT MAN! I love you soooooo much sweetheart!

Happy Valentines Day tomorrow! I really wish you were here! But I just want you to know that I love you with all of my heart. I am thinking of you, and I miss you!

Rocky + Emily= LOVE!
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Monday, February 7, 2011

One Boy, One Girl Ultrasound Pics at 16 weeks old!

My little boys profile! Do you see his little head?

Oh Boy, Oh Boy! This one is a boy! Do you see his legs, and then his little package in the middle?
My little precious angle girl! Do you see his legs, and in the middle there are 3 lines. That means a little girl!
Look how cute his little profile is! Do you see his face? His little nose! I love it!
My little girl sure has a spine! Do you see her head on the right and then her spine on the top.

We are so exited! We have one of each. One girl and One boy. I tired to download the song "One boy, One Girl." But it only played for 7 secs. Ugh! Anyways hope you enjoy!

Me at 16 weeks pregnant

Rachael made us this the day we found out!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Paul Simons Feb 7, 1959- Jan 27, 1999

Paul Simons (Feb 7, 1959- Jan 27, 1999)

This blog is in the memory of my wonderful step-dad, Paul. He really was one of the best men that ever lived on this earth. I miss him soooo much, and love him with all my heart. He is the best father that a girl could ask for. I know I was just his step-daughter, but he took me on as his own. I really wish I still had Paul around to help me and teach me. He taught me some of lives most valuable gifts, like honesty.

In Jan 15, 1999, I was only 16 years old. I remember coming home, and going through the garage to go inside the house. I saw Paul, working on his motorcycle, getting ready to take it out the following morning. I first just ran past him at first, but as the door shut behind me, I had a feeling to go back into the garage and tell him that I loved him. To this day, I am so grateful that I did. Because that was the last time I saw Paul healthy. I found a stupid excuse to go back into the garage, told him I love him and he told me he loved me too.

The next day, Jan 16, 1999, I was at my step-mothers, Deanne's house. My mom called, and once I heard her voice, I had a terrible feeling that something was very wrong. I just heard it in her voice. She told me that while Paul was out with his sons, and friends dirt bike riding, that he had an accident and was in the hospital. They life flighted him up to LDS hospital in SLC, UT.

Later I found out that Paul was dirt bike riding in the mountains. They were having tons of fun. He loved it when it rained the night before, because that made it perfect for dirt bike riding. He was going around a corner of a cliff, and was going a little too fast around the corner. His bike went over the cliff, and into a pond of water. His back hit the only rock that was in that area. He was paralyzed from the T-5 down. It was one of the worst brakes they have ever seen before.

We hurried to the hospital. He was going in and out of different test. He was on a breathing machine, that he hated. I hated it too, cause it was hard to talk to him. We kept going up there to visit, but Paul was also struggling with Staff Infection and Phenomia. We started to think of ways, that we had to change our house, to help him come home. We started looking into different scholarships that help people that are in Paul's situation to help him continue being the head of the household. But the only thing that mattered was that Paul was alive. We did not care what condition he was in, we wanted him!

The last time I saw Paul, I think hurt me for years. I felt like I lied to him, but I honestly I thought he was going to come home. The doctors told us that they were going to do a few test with Paul and he was going to be busy for a few hours. So my boyfriend, David and I, decided to go to the gift shop to waste time. We were on the elevator to go down, and from a different floor, some doctors rolled in a patient on a bed. It was Paul! It was the first time he did not have his breathing tube in, and I could finally talk to him for a few minutes. He looked at me and all he said over and over was "I thought I was going to die." I promised him that he was not going to die, that he was going to come home soon, and that I loved him. That was the last time I talked or saw Paul alive!

After 11 days of being in the hospital, Paul died of Staff Infection and Phenomia. We got news that he was going down hill, and get to the hospital fast. The hospital was a little over an hour away from us. By the time we got to the hospital, he already past away. I remember going into that room, and just looking at him. He had blood coming out of his nose, which was Staff Infection. They made sure we washed our hand very well before leaving the room. I just stood there holding him hand, starring at him, hurting inside. I kept it all in, until I went outside the hospital, around the corner, where no one could see and cried and cried. I want my dad back! I wanted My Paul. I wanted my Paully Waddle Doddle Scotty Simons (my personal nickname for him. I was the only person that he let give him a nickname)!

It has now been 12 years. This time of year is hard for our family. Cause his accident was Jan 16th, he died Jan 27th, his funeral is Feb 1th, and his birthday is Feb 7th.

But I know that Paul is always watching us. I have felt his hands on my shoulders during a temple dedication. And I had a dream right after his death that will always be precious to me.

My dream was that my family was having a little family get together. I looked out the window, and saw Paul was sitting on the lawn chair with his legs propped up looking in at us from outside. He had his cowboy boots on, his cowboy hat on, and his cowboy belt on. He was just sitting out there watching us peacefully and happily. I walked outside, and asked Paul "Why don't you come inside?" He told me that he cannot come inside with us, but he will always be watching us. I woke up right after that. Even though he is not physically here with us, he is watching us. He does love us. We are his family.

Paul's birthday is 2 days away, on Monday. If he was still alive today, he would be turning 52 years old. He died when he was 39, almost 40. The interesting fact about that, is he was afraid of turning 40. He thought 40 was old, and did not want to be old. He told us that if he ever got too old, put him on a motorcycle and push him over a cliff. 11 days before he turned 40 he died as a result of a motorcycle going over a cliff.

I believe Paul is happy. But we sure do miss him. I hurt all the time, cause my birth father and I do not have a close relationship. I guess I crave what Paul and I had. I really want a close relationship with my father, but I doubt it will ever happen now. But at least at one time in my life, I did have a father that truly loved me. Truly accepted me. I had a great father, and I will one day be with him again, because of the great plan that our Heavenly Father has given us! I love you Paul, and will always be thinking of you!

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Kody @ Power Tumbling

For the Teachers Quorum activity they went Power Tumbling. Kody asked me to come along, so I could videotape his awesome moves! He is pretty good at it, so please enjoy!